Monday, May 7, 2012

7 Reasons a Game Character Girlfriend Would Suck (not in a good way)

I talked about guys marrying videogame characters a few days ago. Albeit I think they are either mocking us (likely) or being really crazy (possible, but unlikely), I can understand why some guys would wish a real girl who are just like many ladies in the games they play. Which is an incredible bad idea, for reasons like...

7. Poor Choices in Clothing

Yes, your girlfriend who are just like a videogame character will usually dress with a very revealing outfit, and that would not be a problem if they had the good sense of using them in certain situations, like in a summer day or/and while at a pool party. But they see no problem in using a bikini while fighting monsters, so no reason they would put a more sensible clothing while in your cousin's marriage or your grandma funeral.

Either that, or they would dress like a mechanic as their idea of sensible clothing. All the time.

6. They are too Busy for You.

Videogame girls are always fighting evil lords, street fighters and other big problems. It means they are very career oriented and would dedicate a lot of time with their jobs instead of dates and dinners. It is not a bad thing that they have a job, I think it is always good to both sides on a couple to be employed. But the fact is that those girls put their jobs first and their relationships later. And once you are alone, while she is doing another overnight shift at her job seeking for that promotion, you will wish a less busy girl by your side.

5. They Don't Need You.

Not even to open a pickle jar. They can do it. they probably an do way more things that you can do and they know it. All the relationship would be based on her need for moral support and love, but guess what? They don't need it. They don't need no man by their side. They can take care of themselves and don't have any need for your support. 

4. But you Cannot Handle Them

If you ever dated a girl before, you know how hard is to deal with them. How discussions can drag way more them they should or how small things can become a big deal with no previous warning. While you can deal with it when you are in the same level than your partner, those girls are in a different level than you. They will not gave up in a discussion just to make you happy, because they are so strong and independent that they don't need to. If they want to go for chinese, you will eat chinese, because there is no way to make your point against them.

3. The Other Kind is Way Worse.

Of course, not all videogame girls are strong women. Some are damsels. The problem is that they are too much damsel. They apparently cannot do anything without help, are always in troubles they cannot escape by themselves and you will be the one always trying to get them out, fighting a dragon a day for them.

2. They Have Issues.

They all have. Troublesome family, a troubled past, troubled relationships. Trouble is part of their nature and you will have to put up with them if you want to be with them. Not that they cannot solve the problem by themselves (unless they are damsels), but you will be in the bottom of their priority lists until they solve their problems. And while you wait for them, they will hurt you along the way. Badly.

1. They Don't Have to Tolerate your Shit.

They don't. If you piss them of, they can just leave you. Since they don't need you emotionally or otherwise, it is easier to them to move along. Unless they are the maternal type and helping you is one of their objectives, they will not hesitate in dumping you. Even the damsels will leave you if they believe that you have wronged them.

And now, you might be thinking that if you are a male videogame character, you could have all the girls you want, right? Well, come back here tomorrow and I will show you why you are so wrong...

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