Friday, April 13, 2012

Being True to Yourself

I don't know if I am a nerd, a geek or whatever. I know what I like. I like games, anime, manga, cartoons, comics, Sci-fi, toys, J-Pop and women. Yesterday, I joked about going to a world where all women loves me at Twitter, and during the ensuing jokes, I talked that starting a relationship of any kind by hiding what you really like would be a really bad way to start it.

I have talked before about how being a geek/nerd is today considered cool. Part of it is because with the internet, things that were confined before as very niche, like anime, become really popular and widespread today. In my teen years, to see an anime who weren't on TV was a hard task, with very few places to go. today it is easy and you can even find them in big stores.

If you are in São Paulo, Brazil, this is the place to buy anime and manga stuff.
During many years, admitting liking some of the stuff I like today were asking to be ostracized. The majority of people would look to you like you are some kind of weirdo. After all, society have expectations on how someone 'normal' should behave. And people like me felt compelled to hide this hobbies. You could only admit it in conventions, but not at work, not at college/school and definitely not with the ladies.

But things changed. Today people, thanks again to internet, have way more access to those things, and while huge fans like me are still a minority, you will find people who like that one anime, that one cartoon. So, that needing to hide who you really are and what you really like is not needed anymore to have relationships.

And girls like her exists. You just need to treat her as a person and not a prize.
Starting relationships, be it friendship, be it any other, by trying to be something you aren't is never a good start. You will be unhappy by hiding what you really like to do, while being surrounded by people who may be the 'cool' people, but who are doing the things they like while you will always feel like the outsider, the one who is always wanting to be somewhere else with someone else.

Your friends will not be the people who tries to make you let go of the things you like. Even if they don't like it, your friends will be the ones who accept it. Changing yourself just to be with the cool people is not what will make you happy.

I am not saying, on the other hand, that you must not give a crap about other people opinions, hobbies and feelings. Being the guy who cannot shut up about how cool your hobbies are will make you unwanted. There is place and time for everything. What I am saying is that trying to be what you are not or denying liking what you like will eat you from inside.

If people don't like you because you like to collect PVC figures, well, that is bad. For them, of course. You can always find another collectors to be friends with. it is very hard to do this, and it is even harder to not judge others, but I try. everyone must try.

Happiness is not giving up on yourself to please others. Think about it.

No comments:

Post a Comment

Please leave a comment.